Wednesday, June 8, 2011

On being annoyed

It is really hot.  So hot that they are sending kids home from school as to avoid baking them into child-raisins.  Due to this obscene heat I am forced to water the garden at least twice a day.  The garden that is slowly dying the death of too hot for those types of plants and not enough sun for the ones who can handle it.  I am dragging an always jumbled hose to the far reaches of the yard to water a garden that is now being digested by a small family of furred creatures.  I am down to one squash plant which is suffering due to a loss of many leaves.  I thought they didn't eat squash plants!? I never had a problem at the old house and really felt confident putting them out in an open space to spread and produce beautiful fruit to store away until winter.  I have two stems to prove how wrong I was.  The beans are being run down by squirrels and eaten by ants.  Half the plants have disappeared in a week.  The ones still standing look like one light breeze could topple them for good.  My best crops last year were the squash and beans and now I watching as they loudly hint at the fact that we will not be eating any squash in January or picking an aprons worth of beans with the sunrise.  I am annoyed.  I don't feel like there is any lesson to be learned.  I can't grow from this experience.  I can certainly bitch about it.  But even that isn't helping very much.  I could spend an hour searching for the right homeopathic remedy to keep me from tearing out every last plant and burning them in a funeral pyre sort of ceremony. Or I can call Liz, the friend who some how makes me laugh when I want to cry and let's me cry when I have needed to cry for so long that I can only laugh. There is something about seeing a mirror of your life to make it all see a bit easier.  I am sure that her lovely children are also up to no good, her garden is also being digested by small furry demons, she has also lost all control of the world we try so hard to keep spinning and most importantly, is completely okay with it. She is my Zen Mama Guru and I am so very thankful for her entering my world at a time when I needed anything Zen to keep me in place. I hope you all have a friend who keeps you from burning your life in a funeral pyre, they are priceless.

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